A: of course. i would never tell lies on the internet
A: NOAA certified carcinological oddity and fractalnaut at your service!
Q: how did you do (xyz)?
A: oh, an actual question. if you want to know just email me! (or feel free to just rip from my page source. i'm not a cop. that said... good luck navigating my hellish code)
Q: are you addicted to trolling?
about me (the webmaster)
hello! my name is AUGUST LYLE, known in several circles as "CEPHALON", but most people just call me august. i am an inhabitant of the southwestern united states and i have been seen in the wild engaging in several activities such as 'MAKING BAD WEBSITES' and 'CRUDELY DRAWING ANTHROPOMORPHIC ANIMALS ON THE COMPUTER'. i like to think of myself as a chill guy so feel free to reach out if you wanna shoot the breeze. don't be afraid to follow up too if i dont respond at all because i tend to procrastinate or completely forget about these sorts of things but i swear i mean nothing by it :p
CEPHALON 7000, or just "CEPH7K" for short (he/it), is my robot alter-ego and the eponymous mascot of my internet presence. he is an often malfunctioning robot with an old 2000's era pc for a head. given his incomplete and damaged circuitry, he shouldn't even be functioning at all, and yet he has miraculously been running without any need for an external power source or human input for years. this came about mysteriously after he appeared to gain sentience (or at the very least the ability to pass the turing test) one day after he reportedly fell in the ocean. the phenomenon that could have possibly caused this lacks any concrete scientific explanation to this date, but everyone just has to live with it.
nobody really knows what it was originally programmed to do, but it does appear to have a fascination with aquatic life that becomes evident after observing what kind of specimens it likes to stick in its arm tanks. it will violently attack anyone who tries to make it undergo repairs with little restraint, so safe to assume that despite some crucial inner mechanisms getting waterlogged and rendered useless in there, it's far happier this way.
contents inside its chassis include but are not limited to: plastic aquarium toys, live fish, a human spleen(citation needed), and a colony of coral polyps.
he is a bit dim-witted, but he's having a fun time and that's what counts!